Hey, my name is doubt.

Throughout my life, I went through many ups and downs, challenges and obstacles, happy times and unhappy times. There are so many things I’ve learned from my experiences, but also from experiences and examples from others. During the last weeks, I read many stories from adults, teenagers, and children who self-doubt themselves a lot. Today, I want to share what I’ve learned on how to deal with those. And how to deal with people who doubt you.

First, I want to tell you that you are not the only person with self-doubts. Everyone has them. And everyone will have them. Even the most successful person in the world has them. We all have to deal with them. I believe the key to the solution on how to deal with self-doubts is to accept them first. Acceptance is the first step to recovery in my so many aspects of your life. For example, I needed to accept, that I am not the fastest learner, considering school, I want to be. It takes me a little longer to learn for an exam and to understand the material. I always doubted myself, that I wasn’t smart enough. My brother studies the same thing for like an hour and he knows it by heart. I need a few more hours. I always asked myself why. Why is he able to learn so fast? And why I am not? It took me a long time to accept that I’m just not as fast of a learner as some other people are. I just need a little more time. And that is okay. I am still a college graduate with a bachelor degree and enrolled in a master degree program. Once you are able to accept your self-doubts, you can work on them. You are able to learn how to live with them. And you are able to make them invisible. Sure, from time to time, they want to come out screaming “hey, you remember me? I’m your little self-doubtlett!!” Let them come out for a few minutes or hours and then put them right into their little self-doublett box far away inside your head again. Tell yourself, that it is okay to have them. And it is okay, that they come out once in a while. But be able to close that box again. It is okay to be frustrated with yourself. Trust me, I can be frustrated with myself, too, when I don’t get something right in the first place. Tell yourself “Okay, I am not able to do this this way. But I can do it another way.” Or tell yourself that it is okay of things take a little more time than you originally planned. It is okay to have to do some things a whole different way you originally planned. Keyphrase here is: IT’S OKAY.

I know that you are not only doubting yourself but there are also other people who doubt you. My advice, just let them talk. One of my teachers once told me in a roundabout way, that I should not be studying something that has to do with English, which was my plan. Now, I have a Bachelor Degree in English and in about a year, I have a Master Degree in it with good grates. Therefore, I proved him wrong. Sure, I listen what he had to say. I considered his opinion. But in the end, I did what I thought was best for me and what I wanted to do. Don’t listen to other people’s doubts when you know for yourself that you can do it. Don’t let other people’s doubts take you down. You decide what you want to do and what you think you can do. Even if it does not work in the end, at least you have been true to yourself. And you do not have to prove anything to anyone but yourself.

When self-doubts or doubts of other people are too overwhelming for handling on your own, go talk to someone you trust. It can be a parent, a friend, a boy- or girlfriend, a family member, or even a therapist. Don’t be ashamed of it.